Guys, I’m going to take you behind the curtain.
Before I started this blog, often when I looked at FB, Insta, Twitter, Pinterest, I noticed something. I looked at all the Glamour Glow photos and the smiling, always happy, perfectly posed families with stretched smiles — and I didn’t recognise my own life in any of them.
They all looked surreal to me, Stepford-like, a Hallmark Card frozen in time, so happy, so blissful, so…
Not me, not us, not “real”.
- Not the woman I saw in the supermarket grinding her teeth to stop from yelling at her kid who keeps running off.
- Not the mum stood at her kitchen stove, a baby on the hip, a faraway look in her eye as she stirs the pot of curry that has taken her 4 hours to make because she had to keep stopping in order to wipe toddler arses & fetch juice & kiss boo boos better.
- Not the dad who loses himself in TV binge-watching to escape his debts, his job, his self-loathing & ignore the fact that his family is broken.
- Not the mother at the park, holding her 2 kids at arms length to stop them kicking seven shades of sh*t out of each other because they each want that particular swing.
- Not the guy who’s continually overeating because he’s been overweight for so long so what’s the point?
- Not the mum who’s been up all night with a teething baby, messy hair, baby vomit on her shirt, baby drool dripping down her neck, Calpol on her bed sheets.
- Not the wife who hasn’t had sex with her husband in 5 weeks because she’s too damn tired.
- Not the girl who starves herself because when she looks in the mirror all she sees is fat & she hates herself.
- Not the family who’s had a massive row & hasn’t spoken to each other in days.
- Not the father who’s spent the last hour on his hands & knees scrubbing the toilet training accidents out of the newly laid carpets.
- Not the kid who’s being bullied relentlessly or the woman who’s broken out in a billion hormonal PMS-induced zits.
This is real life.
Families are not perfect. People are not airbrushed. No one’s getting enough fricking sleep. Everyone hates one aspect of themselves. Nobody likes their kids 100% of the time. We don’t all eat organic, ethically, locally, magically sourced, 100% perfect, nuns-wet-themselves-when-they-taste-it, fermented in a Golden Eagles butt crack, produce. We don’t all get bathed in kale & eat spinach cereal for breakfast. Nobody enjoys exercise 100% of the time as much as they say they do.
Image from Pinterest
Hiding the reality of our lives does not make us better than everyone else, or make anyone else feel better about theirs.
We, instead, feed this fake, faux, unreal, hidden, “she’s better than me at that so I’m no good” societal propaganda where everyone, ultimately, ends up feeling even sh*tter about themselves. We are more isolated. We constantly feel the need to strive to be something other than what they are.
But we are human — we belong to this race that screws up hourly and apologises too much. Nobody knows which way is up and everybody eats far too many takeout. We yell at our kids too often and don’t talk enough and hope and hope and hope…
So my goal is to be as real as I can be.
To show you what is behind the curtain — and maybe even behind the curtain that is behind the first curtain. Because we like layers, us humans. That’s what makes us human. It’s what makes us unique. No pretence. No front. No BS. Just real people, doing their best.